2009 Priorities and Goals

Jesus Christ
* Develop a vibrant prayer life
* Consistently journal

Family
* Focus on practical scripture application
* Grow my Mary Kay business

Community
* Learn to speak Spanish fluently
* Be purposeful in sharing my faith and the gospel

Health
* Change my relationship with food
* Exercise regularly

These are my 2009 Priorities and Goals. It's something I started a couple of years ago in light of everyone asking "What are your New Years' resolutions?" I do not know that I have resolved anything, but in the spirit of pressing on toward the goal Christ Jesus had laid before me, these are the things I have deemed as my priorities for the coming year! :)

As we near the celebration of the birth of Christ, I pray you'll not only celebrate what it means that a savior was born, but also take to your heart what receiving His gift means in terms of the way you live. Christmas can be easily passed over in the hustle and bustle of gifts, family, food, shopping and traveling, but with purposeful action, Christmas can live all year long in your life!

A Weekend to Remember

My husband and I just returned from a Weekend to Remember conference! It was an incredible experience, so I just thought I would share some of the wonderful things I learned!

The first session was on why marriages fail. I knew some of the reasons in a general sense, but it was eye opening when the speakers talked specifics about a particular topic. One thing that Shea and I didn't realize affected us so much was family history and painful experiences. He and I had such different families and I also carry scars from being sexually abused as a child. Despite the years of counseling, aspects of our family history and my painful childhood experiences are bringing forth new challenges. Being aware of it and being given tools to work through this has been an incredible blessing to our marriage!

One hugely eye-opening challenge to today's marriage is the world's pattern for relationships. This was something we knew, but really, I think we only saw the tip of the iceberg so to speak. There were some significant things this conference identified that we didn't realize we were following. We thought we knew what to watch for in the world's pattern, but even so, there were ways in which Shea and I were following a worldly pattern instead of applying God's truth.

Communication, conflict, sex, children, family model and roles were just some of the highlights we covered during the conference. I took away some pretty simple, but life-changing tools. One thing I set in my heart to do from now on, was see Shea as if he had "From God" stamped on his forehead. I have viewed Shea as if I chose him, but truly, the Lord chose Shea for me, wrapped him up in this particular packaging and sent him to me. The challenge is now receiving Shea as God's perfect gift to me! I am amazed! (Small, simple...but like I said...life-changing.)

Another thing I walked away with was the objective of seeing what God has made in both Shea and our children and being used to bring out that devine image. As the Michelangelo lived with a slab of marble for a month, he worked to see the devine image stamped in that marble...then diligently, patiently, and lovingly brought out the image of David. In just that way, I need to see every unsightly vein, every crack, every unusual pattern as part of the devine design imprinted in my family member. The Lord can use me to bring out that breaktaking image He has put there!

Then there was the area of submission. While I was blessed to see that the Lord had already instilled in me His view of biblical submission, I was humbled to see so many areas in which I had not been practicing it. Decisions are something I saw that I made independently still, even to the point of resenting it if I was called out for having made the decision independent of any thought or consideration given to my husband. It is encouraging to know that now I see the error of my ways, I also see how wonderful it will be to do things according to the scriptures. I see how submission will free my husband up to be the leader God has called him to be. I see how submission to my husband is parallel and necessary for submission to God himself. All in all, I am excited about what more whole-hearted submission will do, not only for my marriage, but also for my relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ!

If you're married, no matter how good or not-so-good your marriage is...if you're divorced...if you're thinking about getting married....this is an incredible conference that packages God's power in principles that will mean life, hope and blessings for your marriage or ressurrection to that which you thought was completely dead!

I highly recommend everyone to check out Family Life's Weekend to Remember conferences held all over the country!

God bless you all!!

Husband Encouragement Challenge - Day 9

"...be swift to hear, slow to speak..." James 1:19b

Wow...like a few other verses, this one targets my biggest weakness - my mouth! How I long to be swift to hear and slow to speak, but it takes practice. During this challenge, I admit I often failed to practice this desired trait. But it is amazing to me that when I had, I opened myself to learning about my husband.

Listening is difficult when it seems I have so much to say and so much that I want to communicate to my husband. I also find myself assuming that I know what he's about to say halfway through his sentence, so I begin to formulate my response. Do you do that too?

I pray we will all take the physiological hint the Lord has given us in TWO ears and only ONE mouth - be swift to hear and slow to speak! Listen to your husband and really seek to hear him! Like me, you might be surprised that you DIDN'T know what he was going to say and you might learn something new about him!

God bless you!

Husband Encouragement Challenge - Day 8

“…but who can find a faithful man?” - Proverbs 20:6b

“Faithfulness is a wonderful but rare quality today, especially in regard to marriage. Do you understand how important this quality is? Your challenge is to continue to root out all negative speaking, and plant seeds of encouragement instead. You may be amazed at what will grow.”

I am overwhelmed at the onslaught men endure in our world. Sexual temptation bites at them at every turn, from the women inappropriately dressed everywhere they go, to the billboards advertising sinful scandalous places of prostitution, to the screaming sexuality from every display in the malls and shops. It is every where!

But when I came to this verse during this challenge, I am so grateful that my own husband has done his best to ready himself and obtain victory in the daily battle against sexual temptation - the temptations to lust after an illegitimate picture of what love and sexual satisfaction really are. I am grateful that he has been faithful to seek his fulfillment in our marriage bed, where the Lord rejoices over holy union. I am grateful for the way we have safeguarded our TV’s and computers in our home from the cruelty of the devil’s media schemes. I am grateful for my husband’s faithfulness!

I am no fool though, to think that this is the standard for every other marriage. Many marriages have been and continue to be ravaged by the weakness of the husbands and wives that cave to sexual temptation. I know there are women indulging their romantic fantasies online, in romance novels and in work relationships. I know there are men enslaved to pornography and men led astray by wanton women promising greener grass outside the fences of their marriages. The apple in the garden is still being held out by the serpent and eaten by so many of us.

If your marriage has been harmed by this prevalent sin, my heart hurts for you. I can only encourage you to lean on the Lord and continue to apply the hope of scripture. There is ALWAYS hope in Jesus Christ! He is the master of miracles, Creator and Sovereign Lord of all!! He can and wants to turn your marriage around. Keep appropriate boundaries for your safety and that of your children, but please do not stone wall your heart against unity or redemption. Pray for your husband and keep your hope, not in him, but in Jesus! Please continue to find encouragement for your husband, even if faithfulness is not his strength. Your faithfulness will shine as an example.

And if your husband is faithful, ladies, realize what a treasure you have and applaud it loudly!

Overcome

The human heart is said to be full of wickedness...every kind of vile desire we could imagine is nested from birth in our darkened hearts. When the Lord Jesus comes to live in us, the darkness gives way to light! Death gives way to life! But I often feel much like Paul...The things I want to do, I don't do. Those things I do not want to do, those I do. This from the same spiritual leader that gives us hope in verse like "count it all joy to suffer", "I have learned to be content", and so many other key encouraging passages in the New Testament.

I marvel at how difficult the Christian life can be. How the inner spiritual battle can wear us down and beat us against the rocks as waves of the culture and sinful desires seek to overcome us. How we can be overcome by the negativity of the world around us! I am astonished at how joyless our lives as Christians can become when we, of all people, should be the most joyFUL.

But there is a verse I have taken to heart as of late - Do not be overcome with evil, but overcome evil with good. Couple that with the verse that says, take heart for I have overcome the world, and you have an encouraging command that promises the Lord's power within us.

So as I sit here marveling at the spiritual struggles I am enduring, I take these two Truths to heart:

1) Evil has already been defeated.

2) I can (and am commanded to) overcome evil because of the victory already won for me.

So if you are struggling with something - an addiction, a hardness in your heart, pride, weariness, depression, loss, anxiety, fear, whatever it is....take heart...Jesus has overcome all the world, and if you have Him, obeying the command to overcome the evil, be it in your heart or in the world, is not such an overwhelming or insurmountable task.

Come to the foot of the cross and remember that victory has been had already!!

Husband Encouragement Challenge - Day 6

"...whatever ye do, do all to the glory of God." 1 Cor. 10:31b

If this challenge has been difficult for you...perhaps you are in a crisis marriage...each day is probably excruciating to you and seems to be taking the very strength of the solar system to be obedient to these verses. Even for some of us in a pretty stable or fairly healthy marriage, we can find this challenge difficult on some days. But early on we have been given a directive that I think is imperative to the remaining days: do it for the glory of God!

Let's not miss that this challenge isn't just about our husbands. This challenge is about taking God at His word and being obedient for the sake of the relationship you have with Him! The very role of a wife is such a beautiful picture of a helpmate...an encourager...one who comes alongside to reflect the love of Christ to her husband and the beauty of the Body of Christ to the world! I could not do it verbal justice if I tried to paint such a picture...but please, if this challenge is difficult for you, keep this verse handy. Keep this truth in front of you at all times...because ultimately, your obedience and submission is to the Lord Himself. And He promises to bless the walk of the righteous and the obedient.

Keep pressing on toward the goal, ladies! The goal is to be transformed by the Lord through the diligent application of His word! And when we are transformed, there is no way that our marriages go untouched by such a transformation...and I would be so encouraged to know that we are all moving into the wonders of His blessings because we have chosen to do marriage God's way!!

Now is the time...

I admit to feeling pretty disappointed, but not surprised at the outcome of the Presidential election. I am deeply saddened that so many voters were so overtly concerned with the "economy" and their "money" that they failed to vote for morality. Although that is not the case everywhere with other issues...marriage protection is holding strong in some areas and I am looking forward to seeing some of those things turn out for the good of the people. But when it came to electing a man that would in some way uphold morality, America as a whole has failed.

America has elected for their President a man who promised change. But America, I ask you...do you truly understand the change you have asked for? Do you understand the ramifications of the repeal of DOMA? Do you understand what abortion has done to this country and what this new administration's advancements of that agenda will continue to do to this nation? Do those of you who voted for Obama solely on the basis of the color of his skin, understand that you have completely undermined what Martin Luther King and so many civil rights activists fought for....judgement of a man NOT by the color of his skin but instead of the content of his character? (That totally casts shadows the victory of his election as the first African American president!) Do those of you who held up the economy as your number one issue have any idea how that reinforces a love for money and a lack of trust in God? Do any of you even care?

May God have mercy on us, America. We will get what we've asked for, but I pray it would be only taste enough to allow us to experience the bitterness of our sin. I pray that we, the people of this nation, will humble ourselves, repent and turn from the wicked ways of idolatry and love of money and material wealth...of murder, adultery, and vanity....that a revival will return the heart of this nation back to the God of the bible!! For once upon a time, not too long ago, we were declared a Christian nation - even by the supreme court justices, and I pray we would return to such a heartthrob once more and dispense with the vileness we now celebrate.

May God have mercy on me for being the kind of Christian that was apathetic in prayer until now. Christians, this is no time to hang our heads in defeat. The battle continues and so must our fight. The fight to see the Lord's name lifted on high, to see His people stand up for righteousness sake! Now is NOT the time to stop your prayers or count the losses. Now is the time for action! Now is the time to STAY on our knees!! Now is the time to lift Obama and his cabinet up to the Lord in prayer. Now is the time for personal revival and living out the Great commission! Now is the time for authenticity to be more than a catch phrase! Rise up brothers and sisters! Raise your voices in Praise for the Sovereign Lord STILL REIGNS!!

We are of no consequence in the light of an omnipotent and perfect God, but beloved, I earnestly ask you to remember that despite that truth, God has made himself available to us...He has reached down into our depravity with Hope, Light, Life and given us all that we need for eternity! He has paid the ultimate sacrifice to love the unlovely. After all He has given, how will You respond? Will you continue in apathy? Will you continue in personal rebellion? Will you continue to be self-seeking? Or will you repent and revel in the eternal joy of grace?

Now is the time...

Husband Encouragement Challenge - Day 5

"Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for
necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers." Eph. 4:29

Another verse I have been so convicted by during this challenge. It is said that we since we have two ears and only one mouth, we should be listening twice the time we are talking. Have you ever tried to practice that? Perhaps for those of you who are naturally reserved in speech or shy and quiet that isn't such a difficult feat, but for those of you like me, who have been since gradeschool...as printed on numerous papers by the English teachers..."verbose", listening instead of talking is a challenge indeed!

So as Day 5 came and went, and through this challenge, I have sought to become a better listener. I still stumble and I still tend to be rather talkative, but bad habits are not always easily broken and good habits take time to solidify! So if this is you, I encourage you to keep trying. You may not be all that interested in what your husband says or perhaps you'd like to interject so many useful and "wise" things to enhance the conversation...but alas, let us learn to use our ears more than our mouths and listen to not only our husbands, but many others around us!

God bless and take care!

Husband Encouragement Challenge - Day 3

Just a disclaimer before I launch into the blog...this blog is really a transparent look into my heart. One that leaves me spiritually bare and vulnerable. I pray that my testimony will be an encouragement and point back to the Truth of our Savior. All that I have written here is written with that spirit! May it also be received that way.

"Love suffers long, and is kind." (1 Corinthians 13:4a)

"My God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus." (Philippians 4:19)

It has been difficult for me to practically apply these verses in my marriage. So often, I think when we vow "for better or worse" we really only mean "for better" and when we discover that the spouse we married is a sinner...well...we all have not so loving reactions to the discovery that in hindsight, really should have been plain to us from the beginning. Somehow I thought my husband would sin, but would discover it immediately, repent of it humbly, and always be on the perfect path toward righteousness. I also thought that God would use him to meet all my needs! So when my husband wasn't behaving as I expected and didn't meet my needs like I thought, I felt despair and disappointment in ways I never expected. It's almost laughable when I put in writing, but not so laughable in reality. And so began my journey in seeking a new set of eyes by which to see my husband and our marriage...a vision that has been greatly shaped by verses like these!

Love suffers long and is kind. I have been so prone to taking what could be classified as minor offenses and making the biggest deal out of them. I have taken offense at so many things that, in the big picture, are not that important and honestly, could have been overlooked had I been in a different mood at the time of offense. But you may be saying to yourself..."What about the "big" offenses, Shannon?" What about them? What about when our husbands are not godly upstanding men as they should be? What does patient love look like then? It looks like a wife, taking God's word at face value, regardless of the circumstances. Circumstances never change the Truth. Circumstances never determine whether or not I am patient or not in my love for my husband.

The thing I think most women in difficult marriages find so repulsive is their own notion of "love". It is not beyond my understanding to see how it is impossible to have warm, endearing feelings toward a husband that is ill-treating his wife, perhaps unfaithful, deceptive, abusive, and the like. Loving him does NOT equate to affirming the sin in his life and sometimes, it means holding him accountable for those sins and putting up appropriate boundaries. In my marriage, I had to realize that "love" had to take on a new definition. It was no longer the warm, fuzzy feelings for him that defined my "love". It was action. Acts of kindness, acts of my will to forgive and no longer hold him to the fire for mistakes, acts that conveyed his needs were more important than mine.

There is no doubt that a marriage is most blessed when TWO people operate on the same basis - the same biblical definition of love. But I think we often miss so much blessing when wait to operate that way or worse yet, refuse to operate that way, because our husbands do not! For I know that scripture teaches that God uses the demeanor of a godly wife to woo the wayward husband to Himself. How dare we think so much of our own "rights" and "needs" that we remove the tool God may use to woo His creation, our husbands, unto a righteous relationship!

This brings me to my next point. The other aspect I struggled with was having my needs met. I wanted to believe that the Lord supplied all my needs, but so often I had a plan and an expectation for how the Lord would choose to meet those needs. I had a time frame and a deadline for the Lord's action. A bit arrogant, wouldn't you say? A bit full of myself, would you agree? It was grotesque to think of how impatient and indignant I would be that I would need to feel loved, yet the Lord would not cause my husband to love me with the kind of love the Lord commands in His word. It was especially terrible to think of how a double standard crept into my heart. I would want my husband to meet my needs, unconditionally. Yet, I would not want to return that for him. I only wanted to give when he gave. I only wanted to love when he loved. I only wanted to work when he worked. But I expected such a different attitude and behavior from my husband. - Despicable!

So ladies, the truth is, no matter who we married, we are given commands about how we are to love...how we are to trust. We love unselfishly and expect that our needs are met only through Jesus Christ. We trust Him to love us and clothe us and feed us...even when our earthly husbands do not. Can we do that? Not without the Lord empowering us to do so. Not without being transformed by the renewing of our minds. Not without doing away with our old thinking and implanting the Lord's Truth in our minds and hearts!

May each of you allow into your heart the principles of these verses and others that help us to love and serve our husbands and truly give godly encouragement to the men we married! God bless you!!

Husband Encouragement Challenge - Day 2

Through love serve one another. - Galatians 5:31

Ah...love...so often equated to the flutter of emotions that rushed through our bodies when we first found ourselves attracted to the man we now call husband... Love that would sway us, cause us to daydream, and catch our breath... Love that would keep us going on very few hours of sleep having given those hours to long phone conversations with our beloved.

But alas, every bride finds herself, eventually, at a place where that kind of "love" fades. Of course, it was not love to begin with...sorry to burst any bubble you may have still had, but that rush was simply chemistry. Love...is something else altogether.

The Lord defines love as patient, kind, not jealous, does not brag, is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly, does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, rejoices with the truth, bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things, and never failing. (1 Corinthians 13:4-8)

I don't know about you, but I know for sure that when I look at THAT definition of love, I find it difficult to turn to my husband, and with the same tenderness say, "I love you." I can't live up to THAT! I've discovered that marriage has shown me how IMpatient I am, how UNkind I am, how jealous I am, how arrogant I am, how unbecomingly I act, how much I seek my own, how easily provoked I can be, and can we stop for a minute and review the pages of injustices I have kept?... I don't bear all things, believe all things, hope all things, endure all things and all I come to is the discouragement of ABSOLUTE FAILURE!!

But let's not stop here, ladies. We're not hopeless and failure is not the end of our stories. Truly, I say to you, this challenge of encouraging our husbands is about seeking the source of all strength, all hope, all endurance, all belief and all VICTORY!! - JESUS CHRIST!!

I personally can find many things to praise my husband for in the area of serving our family. That may not be the case for you. But either way, I would encourage you to take this verse from Galatians and allow the Lord to show you how YOU can serve your husband...how YOU can demonstrate the love given you by the Savior and lavish on him.

Remember...We are completely depraved. There is nothing good in us apart from Jesus and yet He lavished His love on us through the cross of Calvary. He endured the most wretched of circumstances to extend His love for us. Now, while none of us are Jesus, we ALL (who have Him as Lord and Savior) are His creation and have been given everything we need to accomplish the good works that He set for us to do before He even laid the foundations of the earth. (Eph 2:10, Phil 1:6, Phil 2:13) Your husband may not deserve a back rub today. Your husband may not deserve an extra special dinner. You may desperately want his help with the house today even though it would be his only day to watch the game he taped last weekend. But what are you going to do to reflect the sacrificial, agape love of Jesus Christ today? What kind of selflessness are you going to show? What undeserved kindness? How much of that record of wrongs are you willing to expunge?

It's not impossible ladies - ALL things are possible with Christ who strengthens us! But now is the time to die to your SELF and live for Christ!! And ultimately it is the Lord we are serving when we serve our earthly husbands, worthy or not. So let's set out today with a heart of love that reveals itself through godly service! May you be blessed and may our Lord reap all the glory!!

Husband Encouragement Challenge - Day 1

The heart of her husband safely trusts her; so he will have no lack of gain. She does him good and not evil all the days of her life. – Proverbs 31:11-12

Let us depart from the traditional application of this verse to the earthly married couple and remember a couple of other applications as well. First, the single woman with a heart that perhaps one day she will be married carries the responsibility to remember in her words, thoughts and deeds of today, the husband that the Lord may provide tomorrow. Does her life today reflect and honor to do good and not evil for the husband who may be in her future? Is she keeping herself spiritually and physically pure? Does she cave into cultural pressures to man-bash or discount the authority and responsibilities of the men around her? Is she building a character of trust-worthiness that will carry over into her marriage? Those are all things that a single woman who takes the commands of God seriously can take away with her from this verse of scripture.

Second, any daughter of the Lord is a bride of Christ Himself. Does she remember that her Heavenly Husband deserves the offerings of trustworthiness and devotion as well and more so than any earthly husband? My prayer is that is that this is a realization for each one of us.

So ladies, as we are encouraging our husbands, let us remember that this challenge is about allowing the Lord Jesus to work in OUR hearts – to change US! Even the most lost of husbands are not beyond the reach of the Lord, and what a precious instrument He would have in His hand when He possesses a godly wife, wholly submitted to Him, loving Him and obeying His commands – allowing her character to be refined and her heart molded to the likeness of her Savior! May His hand be on all of us!!

Life - My Eternal Investment Portfolio

I guess it is just one of those times where I want to sit down and be reflective. Life, overall, is pretty good. I honestly can't complain. I am so blessed to have a wonderful husband, who does so much to serve us and bless us, a man who has such a caring heart! I have a son who is amazing and keeps me on my toes! I am blessed that, despite much of the economic turmoil, my job is not yet in jeopardy. I have an amazing home business that is growing. I have a beautiful body of believers with whom I worship every Sunday and most every Wednesday. And the Lord has given me dear friends with whom I can do life!

Does this mean that life is all roses? By no means! But again...I have little to nothing to complain about!

So as I've been thinking about life and thinking about what my life would mean if it were over today...I still find that despite many of my activities and investments, I am disappointed at the measurement I see eternally.

So I count the blessings in my life and turn my thinking toward how it is that I could expand my "eternal investment portfolio". :) Go figure, but this thought process actually began when I purchased a documentary that, unknowingly to me, was about a Mormon missionary to Tonga. (I thought it was a Christian missionary.) So after seeing the way this missionary was so dedicated to the mission of spreading Mormonism (NOTE: I believe the Mormon religion to be a cult and not a true gospel of Jesus Christ.), I began to evaluate my own vigor at sharing the Truth with MY mission field. I don't need to go to Tonga or across the world to share Jesus. I asked myself if I was dedicated to sharing Him here. I was disappointed at the recollection of how many times I had shared my testimony or shared the gospel with the many people I come into contact with. So as I thought about those in my immediate area, I knew one of the things that would expand that territory would be learning Spanish. If I was to, just as the Mormons do, go door to door and share my faith, I knew that there would be many on the other side of that door that wouldn't know how to speak English very well. And if I wanted to reach them with the gospel, I would need to be able to speak at least some Spanish.

I have been excited about my nightly Spanish grammar lessons. I have online resources that help me to know whether or not my pronunciation is accurate (at least for the most part). And I have numerous library resources. I'm also very excited about picking up my bilingual bible this weekend!! It is so encouraging to have a passion kindled in my heart. I haven't been one to consider myself much of an evangelist...but I am an encourager. However, I do not believe any Christian to be exempt from sharing the gospel and making disciples of those the Lord saves! The Lord has given me a heart for my community, so while I'm learning Spanish and getting acquainted with the bilingual bible text, I will be following in Nehemiah's footsteps and engaging in prayer. Prayer as to how the Lord would have the walls of my apartment complex rebuilt...the walls of my city rebuilt...the walls of the county rebuilt...the state...and this great country.

I am amazed at how the Lord uses just one person to touch the world in so many biblical examples...I want my eternal investment portfolio to be something that leaves a legacy for my Savior. I want something to bring to His feet when I finally spend eternity with Him. I want to know that I didn't stop at minimum wages or minimal efforts. I want to know that my life truly and deeply reflected a heart for Him, a dedication to Him, and a legacy of Him!

I guess that would be my random thought process for the day...my little jaunt through the pages of the current chapter of my life...

God bless you!

Will Over The Heart

Something I strive for as a Christian is to avoid being controlled by emotions. Emotions do not rule in this heart...at least not all the time.

I admit I struggle with this more often than I would like to struggle. I find it difficult at times to keep my wits about me in the midst of welling emotions that rage beneath the surface of an otherwise calm exterior. Today was such a day.

It seemed that everything was out to annoy me, and I do mean EVERYTHING. From the oversleeping rush when I stepped out of bed, to the clothes that weren't folded, to the child that didn't think it was a good time to be obedient, to the things on the kitchen counter that no matter where I placed them, seemed to fall to the floor, to the leaking items in the refrigerator, to the medicine that was suddenly uncooperative in being cut in half for appropriate dosage, to the keys that could not be found, to the purse that was saturated with the orange drink from last night, to the .... I could go on, but I think you got the point a few phrases back...thank you for letting me vent!

In and of themselves, these trivial items are so insignificant and what does it really matter? I think it doesn't. Yet, several times I found myself going into my room, sitting on the bed and waiting for tears to come to relieve the anger I felt. I was frustrated and couldn't seem to move the frustration away from myself. I even scared my dog!

So here I am at the end of the day, thinking back over my choices. See, a while back, I realized that these "bad days" were a matter of choice. Granted, that choice was rather difficult to make today, but it was nonetheless a choice still! I regret that I failed to make the better choice sooner, but I guess "better late than never" ? ;)

Come on...laugh with me!

So by the time I left church today, I was on the upswing, and attempting to live out that choice of a better attitude and while my feelings didn't follow immediately, they did eventually follow. I think we women tend to get trapped there. When we do not see immediate emotion change, we give up on the attempt and move on to another strategy. What we can often miss is that, given some time, our emotions can catch up to our choices. Forgiveness, attitude, generosity, kindness, patience...all kinds of things we know we "ought" to "feel", are often a matter of choice that, given time, will change our feelings. But we need to give ourselves that time and go on faith that we are making those right choices even when we have yet to reap emotional rewards.

So anyway, not sure if this made much sense to anyone reading it, but wanted to put it out there anyway! Emotions do not rule unless you let them. So let's recapture and tame the fleshly heart that would stear us into chaos and remember that our will can be exerted over the feelings of the moment. No matter what situation you find yourself in!

God bless and take care!

Staying the Course

As a Christian, do you ever find yourself "backsliding"? I have not yet met any Christian who claims not to have fallen down after beginning the journey of living out that relationship with Jesus. I am no exception!

So here I am - "backslidden" and not such a happy camper about it. Busyness is my biggest weak link in the chain of staying on course. As a wife, mother, employee, friend, and seemingly dozens of other "hats" worn throughout my day, it is more than easy to get caught up in busyness. In those times, I often lose sight of my priorities in the flurry of activities and "to-do lists". I miss out on the tender stillness of time spent in real fellowship with Jesus. My relationship with Him becomes just another thing to check off my list...even in those times I put it on the top of that list. Then, is it any wonder that I find myself far from the Lord, disconnected, and thirsty for the Living Water?

While I would love to give a solution for this pervasive problem, I have none. Staying the course, for me, has meant finding myself here, trying to pinpoint where I went awry, implementing protective hedges, and trying again. No magical wand, no one scripture to memorize, no one thing to "do better"...just the realization that I need to 1) be somewhere other than where I am and 2) be someone I can only be while in fellowship with the Lord Jesus. I have thought that perhaps I was missing something in my protective hedges, but the reality is, we have an enemy that studies us far more than I think we study him and he is clever at finding holes in our armor. In the end, the way to stay out of harms way is by seeking refuge in the Lord. Dying to self, dying to the fleshly nature at war within us, is a daily transformation!

So if you and I will stop right now and think about what today really is - a day of spiritual battling - will we get up and fight or are we going to lay down and play dead? If you are anything like me, you'd rather lay down. It takes effort to do battle. It takes stamina to do battle. It takes a willingness to stay the course. Are we willing? Can we stop in our tracks, no matter how comfortable the deviation, and return to the right course? For both our sake's, I pray so!

God bless each of you and may we all stay on course today!!

Hebrews 10:19-23

Therefore, brethren, since we have confidence to enter the holy place by the blood of Jesus, by a new and living way which He inaugurated for us through the veil, that is, His flesh, and since we have a great priest over the house of God, let us draw near with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled clean from an evil conscience and our bodies washed with pure water. Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful.

Being a Big Girl

I've been listening to a Mary Kay CD by Gloria Mayfield recently, and something she said has really struck me. She talked about making "Big Girl Decisions". Decisions about attitude and outlook and activities. Decisions about business, but also about life. In addition, I've been reflecting on Proberbs 31:10-31, the passage about being a wife of noble character. The proverbs 31 wife is a definitely a "big girl". But where is the application of "being a big girl"...I mean, doesn't that come with age. I'm 30, so you would think I would know how to think and act like a "big girl". But I'm beginning to think it is a little more complicated than just aging.

Proverbs 31 definitely doesn't mention anything about age...it talks about her actions, her reputation, and her attitude! And while it is a pretty "heavy" resume, I think the Lord wants us to be the kind of woman we find in proverbs 31: hardworking, confident, service-minded, charitable, wise, discerning, fearless, industrious, dignified, strong, carrying a sense of humor, and reverent. I don't see that as impossible for any women! But we will not, dare I say "cannot", exemplify any of those things without maturing beyond "little girl" attitudes and behaviors.

I can look back over my life and see where I was wounded as a little girl and it "handicapped" me growing into adulthood. When we are wounded as children, we have to recognize the hurt, deal with it and allow the Lord to heal us so that we can continue on in this life in a healthy manner. I've come to see that I'm still working on this process. Lately, I have not felt like much of a "big girl". Internally, I am throwing some serious "fits" as of late! Struggling with selfishness, pride, and all kinds of heart ugliness! :( And while I didn't recognize it at first, I am beginning to see this as the Lord pulling back some more layers in my life to reveal areas in which He longs to heal and change, restore and renew. I have to say though...I'm not really liking it. Growing up is hard to do!

I've had to make all kinds of "big girl decisions" lately. Decisions about my attitude and whether or not I'm going to let a "bad moment" become a "bad day". Decisions about whether I'm going to do the things I need to do on a daily basis or give excuses as to why I can't. Decisions about whether or not I will whine or complain. Decisions about how I care for and care about those around me. Decisions about money and time. Decisions about words. So many decisions that I have to admit, it has been rather overwhleming. But really, it's all part of my "big girl" life now. I'm not a little girl anymore (and haven't been for some time now). lol

Do you ever feel like that? Like you'd much rather throw a little girl fit than walk upright and make your big girl decision for the moment? Do you ever find yourself NOT biting your tongue and holding back those choice words that flow so easily from the dagger in your mouth to the heart of your husband, child or friend? Do you ever find yourself pouting or creating drama just because someone did something and your feelings are hurt? I think it's time we all recognize our "little girl" tendencies and grow up to be the "big girls" we really are!!

God bless you and may we all be a little more like "Big Girls" today!

The Graces of Motherhood

I've been reflecting lately on my job as a mother. I have so many blessings that have helped me as of late: my employer granting me a new schedule, tons of resources and testimonies, and most of all, the Lord Himself! All things are working together for the good of parenting my son! It's amazing to see how much he's grown. He'll be six years old at the end of this year! Six years have flown by, and I admit I am ashamed that more of those years than not, have been less than intentional when it comes to parenting (training my son up in what I know to be biblical in nature). Yet, after two and a half years of learning what it means to be intentional, I am so blessed to know I'm on the right track to really getting to the heart of parenting...leaving a Christ-centered legacy.

What does that legacy mean? It means I am to teach and train, but most of all - MODEL my relationship with Christ in front of my children. When I do that, I am investing scripture, behavior examples, and valuable life skills for my son to carry with him throughout the rest of his life. At the end of each day, I want to lay my head on the pillow knowing that I did what I could to show him what Jesus is like and how the relationship with Jesus works in the day-to-day. What an incredibly difficult and challenging job! One I could never, in a million years, get even close to right without Jesus' power driving me on every day!

The latest victory was one where Jonathan decided to throw a particularly terrible fit. I thank the Lord that I not only seemed calmed and peaceful through the whole ordeal - I actually WAS calm and peaceful through the whole ordeal!! I was able to use some recently acquired skills and tips in helping him see that he was choosing to do the wrong thing. The whole thing lasted well over an hour, but ended with my son repenting and accepting the consequences for his actions. It was truly a beautiful thing! What used to end with both of us in tears and frustration, ended with smiles and a new beginning! Not because I'm some kind of super-mom, but because God is empowering me to be intentional, consistent, and patient. The Lord has put wise people in my path and great parenting resources based on His word in my hands. But most of all, the Lord has given me grace to make it thus far!! Five and half years of tantrums. Years of tears and frustration and disappointment...feeling like a failure as a mom. And now, by grace...I'm learning and making progress.

Is it perfect? Oh my - no way!!! Is it even close? Nope! But I can see changes in my household's peace level. I see a son who is becoming more and more willing to take ownership for his actions and to say he's sorry. A son who is learning that making bad choices hurts - sin hurts!! And I love it. I love seeing the progress.

For any mom who has come to the end of herself, to the end of patience, to the end of sanity! I know that feeling. I know how discouraging it can be to feel like what you're doing isn't making a bit of difference. To think that if another day like this comes any time soon, you just won't make it and your child probably won't either! But I've learned that there is ALWAYS HOPE!! There is always more to learn, more to apply, and an abundance of strength and patience to recieve for the job at hand.

But I've also learned, that you can't do any of it without grace. Without giving yourself room to be imperfect, or heaven forbid - outright fail! Giving yourself room to mess up without being convinced that somehow your kid will be messed up for life becuase you didn't play out a particular scene with Super-Nanny flawlessness will go a long way in helping you keep your chin up, your eyes a bit drier, and your heart a little less burdened. And when you receive grace, you are so much more likely to GIVE grace! Which is a key ingredient in training our children!

Parenting is too hard a job to try to do it without grace, so please stop going that route if you are. Be the best you can be, but let God do the hard part. Just be available to Him to be used to your full, God-given parenting potential!! It's really the laws of the harvest. We reap WHAT we sow. We reap WHERE we sow. We reap MORE than we sow. We reap LATER than we sow. If you invest in your children the righteousness of Christ, you will, by promise of the Lord, be blessed. You will see more than you ever invested blossom in their lives! But patience is key...it's a long wait sometimes. Perhaps days, weeks, months or even years. But keep it all in perspective...think eternally and you will find that there is so much more joy to be had in motherhood!!

Defining Faith

2 Corinthians 5:7 "For we walk by faith, not by sight".

Faith is choosing to live as though the bible were true, regardless of circumstances, emotions or cultural trends. Do you walk by faith? Or are you making choices based on the circumstances you find yourself in, the emotions rumbling around in your heart, or are you unknowingly influenced by the culture of today? Scripture carries a stern warning for those who try to walk without faith.

Hebrews 11:6 "And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him."

Without faith it is IMPOSSIBLE!!! to please God. God takes no pleasure in us figuring it all out and trying to make choices and live our lives based on how we feel or what we can see about our circumstances. He most certainly is not a god who takes pleasure in the "blind leading the blind" when it comes to culture. Faith is the key to living the Christian life! When we exercise faith and believe He can do the impossible, overcome the improbable, and make a way where there is none, we give Him glory without the detracting note of human ability or human contribution. He loves and commands us to walk by faith!

So that bears the question - am I walking by faith today?....are YOU walking by faith today? Are we choosing to believe the truth of scripture despite how we feel, despite the circumstances we are experiencing and despite what the world around us is saying? If not, why not? Let's start now.

His finest blessings to all of you.

~Shannon

Praise the Lord - I can "Be There"!

God has granted me favor that overflows my heart with joy! In less than a month, my son will start attending kindergarten at a public elementary school. I wanted so desperately to be able to be there for him instead of having him transported to an afterschool daycare for another couple of hours until I was finished working. And after praying for favor and being given the courage to ask my boss for the alternative schedule, I have recently been approved for that schedule!

It is so thrilling to my heart to know that I will be picking my son up when he gets out of school! I can take him - not to another place where I hand him over, again, to someone else, but take him - home. Home - where I can be there to listen to his day. Where I can be there to give him snacks and help him with his homework. Where I can be there to instill in him the skills to live life and meet the numerous challenges that await outside our home!

I am daydreaming about our table, our talks, our TIME!! There is nothing more precious to me than to know that I am being granted time with my son I had to previously give to someone or something else. Being there is such a precious gift to me! I am so grateful for the Lord's favor granted through my boss. Favor that puts me a little closer to the fullness of my hearts desire to stay at home full time and devote myself fully to the making of my home!

What a day to praise the Lord!!! I am so excited that I can - BE THERE!!!

Prayer

So as I have expressed in the past, the Lord has been working on me in the area of prayer. And I wanted to share some things that He has put on my heart.

For me, it started with 1 Samuel 12:23 "As for me, far be if from me that I should sin against the Lord by failing to pray for you. And I will teach you the way that is good and right." Okay...kind of strange I thought given that Samuel is admonishing Israel to turn back to the Lord. In the middle of him telling them to serve Him and stop going after "useless idols"...in the midst of Samuel exhorting them to take courage in God Almighty, he says this bit about himself not sinning against the Lord by failing to pray for the people. I thought, "Wow, God you really do take this prayer thing seriously." But why?

So I began to allow the Lord to speak. Psalm 51:6 says "Surely you desire truth in the inner parts. You teach me wisdom in the inmost place." And Psalm 119:105 says, "Your word is a lamp unto my feet and a light for my path." The Lord wanted to put a truth in my heart to teach me wisdom. He was going to give me His word to direct my feet along His path for my life. And it led me to Deuteronomy 4:7 "What other nation is so great as to have their gods near them the way the Lord our God is near us whenever we pray to him?"

The purpose of prayer is INTIMACY. God demonstrates cover to cover in the bible how much he desperately longs to have a deep and meaningful relationship with His creation. Prayer is the means by which He does it. Prayer is the two-way street of communication with the Holy God we serve.

So then God showed me in Genesis 30, verses 1 and 22 the answer to prayer for Rachel. Rachel in verse 1 doesn't even cry out to the Lord directly, but complains to her husband that she will "die" if she doesn't have a child. She even goes as far as to take matters into her own hands and gives her handmaiden to her husband in order to have some form of lineage through the servant girl. But in verse 22 it says that God remembered Rachel, he LISTENED to her and opened her womb. GOD LISTENED to her. He heard her heart's cry regardless of where she directed it.

Then God showed me in Exodus 2:23-25 "During that long period, the kind of Egypt died. The Israelites groaned in their slavery and cried out, and their cry for help because of their slavery went up to God. God HEARD their groaning and he remembered his covenant with Abraham, with Isaac and with Jacob. So God looked on the Israelites and WAS CONCERNED about them." (emphasis mine) So not only does God listen to our prayers, God CARES!!!

Then turning over to Matthew chapter 20:30-34, we have Jesus' encounter with two blind men. They shout out to him despite the crowd trying to subdue them and they persist. Jesus in verse 32 stops and calls to them. They make their plea and in verse 34 it says, "Jesus had compassion on them and touched their eyes. Immediately they received their sight and followed him."
So God listens, God cares, and GOD RESPONDS!!! Now, granted, he doesn't always respond with a yes to our prayers. Sometimes, like with Paul or Jesus even, our Father says no. But I don't want you to miss that GOD RESPONDS!!

And all this because God is about relationship. He is about INTIMATE relationships! Our communication with the Lord is about enhancing the intimacy in the relationship we share with our Father through Jesus Christ. Within the realm of relationship, exciting things happen!!! That is because the POWER experienced by prayer is CHANGE!!!

Let's look at the things that CHANGE because of prayer.

First, our thoughts and emotions change because of prayer. Philippians 4:6-7 is noted usually in response to worry or being anxious. It says, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understqanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus." Let's pull out two commands here. One is a negative - DO NOT be anxious. The other positive - DO PRAY and PETITION. Why? Because God needs to know what we want? NO! Because God wants to grow closer to us and give us peace that guards our hearts and minds. We gain peace by trust. Prayer is a sign of our trust in the Lord to be who He says He is.

Next, let's look at how prayer changes our PRIORITIES. Psalm 5:3 says "In the morning, O Lord, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation." Psalm 63:6 says "On my bed, I remember you, I think of you through the watches of the night." And there are so many other Psalms that talk about prayer throughout the day. The bible commands us to pray without ceasing. By obeying the word, we experience the power of CHANGED PRIORITIES. Where perhaps other things used to take precedence, an intimate relationship is built by making the Lord our 1 morning and night and everything in between!
With changed thoughts and emotions and changed priorities comes CHANGED BEHAVIOR. Our attitude is changed, Philippians 2:5-8, into the likeness of Christ and we begin to model just as Christ modeled for us, humility to the point of death, even death on a cross. The psalms also talk about our speech, (Psalm 49:3, Psalm 35:28) and how that changes. Ultimately, out of an intimate, love relationship, we obey the Lord. Just as Jesus said in John 14, "If you love me, you will obey what I command."

I love the entire chapter of John 17.

Jesus Prays for Himself

1After Jesus said this, he looked toward heaven and prayed: "Father, the time has come. Glorify your Son, that your Son may glorify you. 2For you granted him authority over all people that he might give eternal life to all those you have given him. 3Now this is eternal life: that they may know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent. 4I have brought you glory on earth by completing the work you gave me to do. 5And now, Father, glorify me in your presence with the glory I had with you before the world began.

Jesus Prays for His Disciples

6"I have revealed you[a] to those whom you gave me out of the world. They were yours; you gave them to me and they have obeyed your word. 7Now they know that everything you have given me comes from you. 8For I gave them the words you gave me and they accepted them. They knew with certainty that I came from you, and they believed that you sent me. 9I pray for them. I am not praying for the world, but for those you have given me, for they are yours. 10All I have is yours, and all you have is mine. And glory has come to me through them. 11I will remain in the world no longer, but they are still in the world, and I am coming to you. Holy Father, protect them by the power of your name—the name you gave me—so that they may be one as we are one. 12While I was with them, I protected them and kept them safe by that name you gave me. None has been lost except the one doomed to destruction so that Scripture would be fulfilled. 13"I am coming to you now, but I say these things while I am still in the world, so that they may have the full measure of my joy within them. 14I have given them your word and the world has hated them, for they are not of the world any more than I am of the world. 15My prayer is not that you take them out of the world but that you protect them from the evil one. 16They are not of the world, even as I am not of it. 17Sanctify[b] them by the truth; your word is truth. 18As you sent me into the world, I have sent them into the world. 19For them I sanctify myself, that they too may be truly sanctified.

Jesus Prays for All Believers

20"My prayer is not for them alone. I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message, 21that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me. 22I have given them the glory that you gave me, that they may be one as we are one: 23I in them and you in me. May they be brought to complete unity to let the world know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me. 24"Father, I want those you have given me to be with me where I am, and to see my glory, the glory you have given me because you loved me before the creation of the world. 25"Righteous Father, though the world does not know you, I know you, and they know that you have sent me. 26I have made you known to them, and will continue to make you known in order that the love you have for me may be in them and that I myself may be in them."

Here I find the PROMISE of prayer.

In verses 19 and 25-26 we see the promise of SANCTIFICATION because of our relationship with Jesus Christ. That sanctification is for believers who have an established relationship with our Father through Jesus Christ. But when the PURPOSE of prayer is sought - INTIMACY, and the POWER of prayer is experienced - CHANGE, then the PROMISE becomes a reality - SANCTIFICATION. We become more like Christ because he is in us and we are in Him.

In summary, Matthew 6:5-8 says

5"And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by men. I tell you the truth, they have received their reward in full. 6But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. 7And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. 8Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.

9"This, then, is how you should pray:
" 'Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name,
10your kingdom come, your will be done
on earth as it is in heaven.
11Give us today our daily bread.
12Forgive us our debts,
as we also have forgiven our debtors.
13And lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from the evil one.'

We cannot expect to understand the purpose of prayer if we are superficial (praying aloud like the hypocrits on the street corners). We CAN expect to have God respond and reward when we are intent on meeting with Him and Him alone (what is done in secret). And when we pray, we are to 1) Acknowledge who God is (Mt 6:9) 2) Submit ourselves to His will (Mt 6:10) 3) Trust in His response and 4) Follow His lead. God LISTENS, God CARES, God RESPONDS because He longs for us to have an intimate relationship with Him that CHANGES who we are and in the end, it brings Him glory, of which He is well deserving!

I hope this will encourage you not just to pray, to experience prayer on a whole new level. To understand it is more than just doing away with worry or avoiding sin by NOT praying. I hope you will engage in prayer because it is the lifeline by which you experience the relationship you have with your eternal Father. And may prayer take on a whole new depth! After all, "What other nation is so great as to have their gods near them the way the Lord our God is near us whenever we pray to him?" Deuteronomy 4:7

Blessings to each of you - Shannon

Put on Love

In Colossians 3, verses 12 through 14, it says "Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity." For someone like me....someone who struggles with a critical heart...this is a "critical" verse. :) By that I mean, a verse that moves my heart from death to life.

Growing up, I felt like I would never measure up. I was an overachiever whose worst fear was failure. Yet, knowing that I could never succeed fully, I simply sought after as few people as possible knowing what a loser I was. That was faulty thinking. Those were lies that this verse erradicates. I am not a failure or a loser. I am God's chosen daughter, holy and dearly loved. So what kind of response does that warrant from me? This verse commands me to clothe myself with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Things that I cannot clothe myself with apart from Jesus Christ.

I am really struggling right now with this command. I want to obey, but my heart is wicked and stubborn and the flesh is warring against my spirit. So I am begging for the Lord to intervene. I want to be compassionate, kind, humble, gentle and patience. I want to walk closely with the Lord. I want to die to my old ways and not allow the flesh to take over what the spirit owns now. How I wish when we became Christians that this war between spirit and flesh would cease. But the Lord knows how much better it is that we battle instead.

And it goes on to a struggle with forgiveness as well. This struggle probably causes the most angst. For the Lord forgives those that forgive. And how can I call myself a Christian, one who has received a full and undeserved pardon for every evil and tresspass I have ever committed and yet, be one that withholds grace from another? Simply put, I cannot.

So I am praying that my thoughts on this verse...my feeble willingness to think this truth over the lies of the past...will bring forth actions that speak these characteristics of Christ. And I pray that over time, the Lord would mold my heart to follow after these things. I pray the Lord would help me to no longer be conformed to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of my mind. That I would truly indeed - put on love!

The Simple Life by A Demon Possessed Man

Mark 5:1-20
“They came to the other side of the sea, into the country of the Gerasenes. When He got out of the boat, immediately a man from the tombs with an unclean spirit met Him, and he had his dwelling among the tombs. And no one was able to bind him anymore, even with a chain; because he had often been bound with shackles and chains, and the chains had been torn apart by him and the shackles broken in pieces, and no one was strong enough to subdue him. Constantly, night and day, he was screaming among the tombs and in the mountains, and gashing himself with stones.

Seeing Jesus from a distance, he ran up and bowed down before Him; and shouting with a loud voice, he said, "What business do we have with each other, Jesus, Son of the Most High God? I implore You by God, do not torment me!" For He had been saying to him, "Come out of the man, you unclean spirit!" And He was asking him, "What is your name?" And he said to Him, "My name is Legion; for we are many." And he began to implore Him earnestly not to send them out of the country. Now there was a large herd of swine feeding nearby on the mountain. The demons implored Him, saying, "Send us into the swine so that we may enter them."

Jesus gave them permission. And coming out, the unclean spirits entered the swine; and the herd rushed down the steep bank into the sea, about two thousand of them; and they were drowned in the sea. Their herdsmen ran away and reported it in the city and in the country. And the people came to see what it was that had happened. They came to Jesus and observed the man who had been demon-possessed sitting down, clothed and in his right mind, the very man who had had the "legion"; and they became frightened. Those who had seen it described to them how it had happened to the demon-possessed man, and all about the swine. And they began to implore Him to leave their region.

As He was getting into the boat, the man who had been demon-possessed was imploring Him that he might accompany Him. And He did not let him, but He said to him, "Go home to your people and report to them what great things the Lord has done for you, and how He had mercy on you." And he went away and began to proclaim in Decapolis what great things Jesus had done for him; and everyone was amazed.”

Did you read all of that? If not, please go back and do so now.

Now, let’s look at what this passage is about. This is one of the most amazing passages. We learn so much in such a short read!!

First, what do we have? We have a man possessed by a legion of demons (v2). He is isolated and alone (v2 and 3). He is hated and people are so terrified by him that they have physically chained him time and again (v4). He is a tormented man in absolute anguish and physical pain (v5).

Next, let’s look at the events.
- Jesus comes on the scene.
- Demons bow.
- Jesus identifies the evil.
- Evil grovels.
- Jesus casts out evil and restores righteousness.

We may not think we have anything in common with a man possessed by a legion of demons, but if you look over that list of events, I think you’ll find, as I did, a common ground. It is the plan of salvation! When Jesus comes on the scene of our lives, we are acutely aware of our lowly status. We become aware of our sin problem. That sin problem is what chains us, what causes us torment and anguish and angst in this world! Humility is the right response to a true acknowledgement of Christ! What is His response to humility? Psalm 149: 4 says, “For the Lord takes delight in his people; he crowns the humble with salvation.” And so he did for this man.

But how does salvation and restoration come to us? First we must allow Jesus to identify the evil. Jesus asked the name of the demon within the man. He identified the whole of the problem. Then evil grovels with Jesus to not be cast out of the country but to be cast into pigs. And though evil believes it has been granted mercy by being cast into pigs, Jesus drowns the whole lot of them. Evil is destroyed!!! So it is when WE receive salvation and restoration. Jesus identifies our sin – the depravity of our souls. We may struggle against the truth and try to justify our sins by moving it “out of the way” as the demons sought to be cast into the pigs. But ultimately, Jesus still has victory!! He will conquer evil. You can either allow him to conquer it and raise you to life, as he did with this man. Or you can be as the demon and cast unto the lake in death, as he did with the demon-possessed pigs!

Just a note here. There is section here, right after Jesus casts the pigs out, details how negatively the witnesses responded. They told the man what they saw happen to him and urged him to leave the region. I just want to say that sometimes when God is at work in our lives, onlookers may or may not understand and sometimes, as is the case here, they may be frightened to the point they don't want you hanging around. Major life change can be scary for anyone and for the onlooker that realizes Jesus' work to be contagious...he or she may run or want you to run in the opposite direction! This conversion, this event was radical. Sometimes being radical for Jesus warrants negative (sometimes VERY negative) attention.

But let's keep going to best part! If you choose life – there is more this passage offers!! The man, now free of his chains both physical and spiritual, longed to go with Jesus. That is an attitude of gratitude and dependency. How many times have you longed to leave the world behind you and be with Jesus? Yet, how does Jesus respond this time? He denies the request and gives the man His purpose for his life. The very same purpose he has given you and me. “Go home to your people and report to them what great things the Lord has done for you, and how He had mercy on you.” When he did, the people were “amazed”!!! (Sidenote again - these people were amazed...some people get scared and want you gone, others are amazed! I guess you'll have to leave the response up to the Lord!) But doesn't this piece remind you of the great commission we find in Matthew 28?

What a simple command. Go and tell them. He didn’t say go to seminary, get trained and be a preacher. He didn’t say sit in bible study classes for the next year at your church so you can tell your neighbor about Jesus. He didn’t say develop a creative and culturally relevant plan. He simply said go and tell your people what Jesus has done for you and how He had mercy on you.

Do you do that? Do you keep it simple enough that when you meet someone, you tell them what Jesus has done for you? Do you even realize all that Jesus has done for you? Does it cause you to bow low and, in an attitude of gratitude, surrender everything you have? Are you even excited enough about your own salvation that you WANT to tell others?

If not, then I pray Psalm 51:12 for you ‘Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit to sustain me.’

This was an incredible read for me. I hope you will read and meditate on this passage and take its message to heart for yourself. May we all learn to keep it simple! May the gospel be our lives and our message regardless of where we find ourselves! Peace!

My Next 30 Years

So if you didn't know...today is my birthday! I have now had 30 years of life, which is awesome! And it is good to take time each year, but especially at significant "mile markers" to take stock of your life and your purpose! So I thought I would jot down some random things I've been thinking about as I knew my birthday was approaching.

First, the last three decades of my life, I have to say are riddled with good and bad things. I guess that is true of any person's life, but I can look back and see so much time that seemed wasted on the world rather than invested for the Lord. I know that all my days were planned and ordained by God before even the foundation of the earth was formed. I think this thought of backward looking need be entertained only long enough to motivate the forward looking. What I mean by that is that if I see "wasted" time in my history, let's not repeat it and make...as the country song goes...my next 30 years...count for something more eternally signficant!

Second, present time would cause some anguish over the age factor. I like 30! Perhaps I should feel old, but instead, I feel more like I'm coming into an age that fits me better than my 20's ever did. I think three decades have been an investment the Lord has made in growing wisdom and maturity that I couldn't have had otherwise. Like those things that are better aged (wine, cheese, trees, etc) I think life grows more beautiful with the passing years. I love the experiences of each season. The season of learning who my real Father was...how sweet it is to know Him! The season of learning to trust Him through obedience (not sure this season has an end though! ) The seasons of singleness, motherhood and now marriage. The seasons of friendships and spritual growth. The wonders of living!! Life is amazing. And if there is another day on the calendar for me after 30 years...I have another 24 hours of wonder to behold! Prayerfully I will make each moment count!

So lastly...what will life hold beyond my 30th birthday? I am sure I do not know! However, with each day, I know it will be a sweeter time with Jesus. With each day, I know it will be more investment in my husband and my son and any other children the Lord may grant us! I know it will mean continued intentionality in sharing my faith and loving the people God brings into my life. I also know it will need to mean dying to my pride, my selfishness, my desires, and oh....my will!!

This season of my life has been taking shape by the most powerful verse that resides in my heart right now: Philippians 1:20-21, I eagerly expect and hope that I will in no way be ashamed, but will have sufficient courage so that now as always Christ will be exhalted in my body, whether by life or by death. For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain. How I want that to be the message of my life!! But it means sacrifice. It means not being so spoiled and self-centered! It means getting out of the comfort zone life and just being American has meant for me.

I am not sure where you are, but I'm at a great point in my life. A point that I have determined to LIVE! and LIVE as Christ. 30 years behind me...perhaps another day ahead...maybe 30 more years. Whatever life brings, I love it and will live it! What about you?

Battle of the Wills

Although I have not ever completed reading James Dobson’s book The Strong Willed Child, I am certain I have a strong willed child! I receive almost daily confirmation of this assessment. Today was no different.

It started off as a pretty normal day. Morning routine, school routine and pick up routine all seemed to be in order. However, I needed to make a stop at Wal-Mart for a couple of things. Let me interject into this part of the story that previously (Monday to be exact), I have given my son his allowance. It has gone from an occasional dollar or two here and there to a regular, once a week allowance of five dollars. That is a lot for a 5 year old, I know. But a dollar doesn’t buy much of anything and at least with $5, he can get something each week or save for something he really wants in a short period of time. The idea is simply to get him to start learning about money. So back on track we go at the point of entering Wal-Mart.

Now Jonathan already knows exactly what he wants to spend his money on. He wants a light saber…the star wars kind. He already has three that he can play with from Christmas last year, but he wants a new one. So after the few things I needed to get, we head to the toy section. Jonathan hones in on the light sabers as if they had a homing beacon and announces that he has found his toy. One problem…

The toy costs more than $5.

As a parent, I am thinking this is a perfect teaching opportunity. I am going to help Jonathan understand what it means to save and work toward a goal. As a child, Jonathan sees only one thing…a light saber and he wants it now.

What I thought would be a “teachable moment” turned into (and please understand I am not in the slightest exaggerating) an hour long fit on the floors of Wal-Mart. First, my son threw himself on the floor in front of the display of star wars items. I thought it would be short-lived and so I began to walk away. At which point, my son did follow me. Only to plop himself down again two isles over. After I left him on the floor throwing the beginning of this fit, he decided to go back to the star wars isle. Then, I picked his very heavy 75+ lbs up and put him in the cart.

I proceeded to the check out, weaving my cart through crowds of onlookers enjoying the spectacle taking place in my shopping cart. The noise level was ridiculous. My red-faced, visibly distraught son, was bouncing up and down in the cart, screaming at the top of his lungs that he wanted out and he wanted his light saber. At the check out stand, I had had enough. He was about to fall out of the cart and hurt himself, so I did what I thought any sensible mom would do. I left my items in the cart at the check out stand, picked up my son and headed for the car, intending to go home and straighten this mess out in a forum less public.

I made it to the front of the store.

I did mention this kid weighs over 75 pounds right?

So I about lost my grip on him near the front door and put him down. He was still hollering, but what happened next was worse! He ran for it!

Through the masses, my short, stout little boy made a mad dash for the clothing section. His bright yellow shirt immediately blending in with the vast array of spring clothing just as brightly colored!

Good grief!! Now where did he go?

Thankfully, I found him perched under a clothing rack. I pulled him out and the next 30 minutes were a physical struggle of restraint. I couldn’t let the kid run around freely in Wal-Mart, but I sure did draw more of those spectators as I sat on the floor in the middle of the women’s clothing section with a little boy locked under my legs and arms as he continued to scream like no other and fight as if his life depended on it. I drew a myriad of looks from concerned, to condemning, to the few but so gracious moms that drew near to say “hang in there” and “you can do it, mom” “don’t give up”. Those who attempted to get through Jonathan's screaming were laughable though! They thought a complete stranger just might have an effect on him. I wish that were the case!!!

Just when I thought my arms and legs could no longer take the abuse of the struggling little monster that has replaced my son, he began to calm down. I sat still and held his profusely sweaty and hot little body as he continued to catch his own breath. I did my best to wipe the beads of sweat that drenched his face and shirt. I spoke gently and lovingly to help him regain his composure. Just when I thought we were on our way to ending the tirade, Jonathan got up and made a dash further into the store to the men’s clothing isles.

Again?

When I found him, I warned him that this had gone on too long and that we were leaving the store. If he chose to continue running and disobeying, I was going to have to spank him. At this point, I had spent 30 plus minutes avoiding the spanking thing…but I had nothing left in my parental arsenal of consequences for this wild and knowingly disobedient behavior. Now, I was desperate enough to either call my husband away from work or call the police. (yes, I’m quite serious). However, three or four rounds with the spanking and finally my son, albeit crying and still not going all that quietly, was marching toward the door.

My emotional and physical strength completely gone, I put him on the bench near the front of the store and sat down to catch my own breath. What a wrestling match!! He continued whining and crying and still testing me. He said he was thirsty and wanted juice. I told him he could have water. When I (again) did not give in, I think it FINALLY clicked with him that I had won the battle of the wills.

Oh my goodness!

An hour of torture in the middle of Wal-Mart and he finally conceded that I was worthy to be his mother! He walked as nicely as could be to the check register where we found my cart still sitting with my items in it. We got a bottle of water for him to drink and he didn’t even put up much of a fight when I told him no when asked if he could have a toy car found in the register isle. (Darn those advertisers and their impulse buy displays!!)

Walking to the car, I couldn’t believe we had seriously spent the last hour doing what we had done. I wondered if round three would start when we went home and I had Jonathan return the $5 I had given him, which was still sitting in an envelope in his dresser drawer. To my surprise and to his credit, Jonathan remembered exactly what I said at Wal-Mart about his behavior and what would happen to his money and he gave it back without a fuss!

THANK YOU, LORD!!

After that, our night was pretty uneventful, but I have to say…I’m tired and am going to bed VERY SOON!!!

Before I wrap it up, let me tell you a couple of things I learned in this situation. One, our children are never too old to test our boundaries as parents, no matter how firm we think they have already been laid. We can either be parents at the cost of our dignity, pride, image and patience, or we can hurt our children by redrawing what used to be safe boundaries they only intended to test and not really move. By not conceding the case with my son, he understood there are still boundaries, there are still consequences for behavior, and there are still things mommy will not tolerate regardless of how much he pleads! Two, I learned that parenting is tough! A lesson I seem to have to learn daily. I would have liked to think the days of these kinds of fits were over at the age of five. I hate that it took such a horrid display in a public setting to get through to my son. However, as his mom, there are no forbidden territories that I will avoid if it means showing him he is loved and that there is safety in the rules he experiences! If that means physically and emotionally exhausting circumstances, then so be it! That is in my job description.

For those of you out there that are parents…I hope this is one of those times when you can feel like I did when those moms came by my horrendous display and said “Hang in there”. I am sure you experience times when your frustration is off the charts and your patience has run out and your body doesn’t want to fight for the role of parent anymore. But I want to tell you, “hang in there”. You CAN do it! Now, if you have an angel that does no wrong, please do us both a favor and avoid leaving such a comment in this blog!

Blessings to everyone!
~Shannon

A Good Word

I receive these daily devotional type messages via email and this one especially touche my heart, so I thought I would share it with you...Be blessed ~ Shannon

June 9, 2008
Liberating Truth
ODB RADIO: Listen Now DownloadREAD: Ephesians 1:3-10
He made us accepted in the Beloved. —Ephesians 1:6

An unmarried missionary had been disparaging herself. She was unhappy with her life in general, but she was especially displeased with what she felt was her low level of spiritual growth.

One morning she looked searchingly at herself in the mirror. Then, very slowly, she said, “God, I thank You that I am myself and can never be anybody else.”

That was her moment of liberating self-acceptance. She realized that by God’s design she was an absolutely unique person, a Christ-redeemed human being who could never be replaced or duplicated.

Do you condemn yourself because you aren’t as spiritual as you think you ought to be? Do you see yourself as a second-rate disciple, lacking the gifts and graces possessed by fellow believers who seem to be models of prayer, witness, and service? We can rise above the mood of self-rejection and enjoy grateful self-acceptance when we put our lives into the nail-pierced hands of Jesus. “In Him we have redemption through His blood, [and] the forgiveness of sins” (Eph. 1:7). We are accepted and chosen by Him (vv.4-6).

If the Lord has accepted us, surely we can accept ourselves! That’s the liberating truth. — Vernon C. Grounds

All praise to the Lamb, accepted I am,Through faith in the Savior’s adorable name;In Him I confide, His blood is applied;For me He hath suffered, for me He hath died. —Wesley

Accepting Jesus’ free gift of salvation frees us to accept ourselves.

Experiencing God

Today was an incredible day!! After an awesome time of learning in God's word and worshipping Him with other believers, I experienced God today in a way that thrilled my heart!!

I love helping people! My favorite way is through spiritual encouragement! But I really love to help people in whatever way there is to help them. I often am uncertain if I am hearing the Lord correctly on what I should or should not do, but in the end, I usually give it my best and hope that I did exactly what the Lord wanted me to do, the way He wanted me to do it. God has, over the years, brought so many different people from so many different places and circumstances. It has amazed me.

Today an opportunity came to help a person. I had something I thought I needed to do first, and did that. And in the midst of doing so, it seemed like I had lost my opportunity. I was pretty upset at first and began praying. I prayed that the opportunity had not been lost. I asked the Lord to forgive me for not responding more urgently to this need. I asked Him to please not let this opportunity escape, but that if it had because of my timing, then I asked Him to send another along in my place to meet the need I saw. No sooner had I finished the prayer, the Lord showed me that this opportunity had not passed and I was able to help!

I went through a small group study a while back on Experiencing God by Henry Blackaby. It was an incredible study and really changed the way I view my purpose in life. And what happened today was one of those moments I treasure. I saw a need...I saw the Lord at work and I asked to join Him! I wanted to be a part of His work and He let me in!! He welcomed me into His work and blessed me beyond measure!!

I tell you that there is no greater joy for me than to be used by the Lord for His work!! I love it, I love it, I love it!!!! :)

So I hope today or at least this week, you will also be blessed to see the Lord at work and join with Him. I pray that your heart will be bent in His direction and your will submitted to Him! I pray that your cup will overflow with His love for you and for those around you! Be blessed and bless others!

I think I know what He's up to...

I'm excited, scared, anxious, gleeful and a host of other emotions difficult to articulate! But I think I'm starting to see a bit of what has been going on with me lately. See, I've been in this rut (per my previous blog), and it has been difficult to get out of it. As a matter of fact, I'm still not out of it. However, the spiritual warfare surrounding me is beginning to become clearer to me. I have been feeling depressed. Not a usual thing for me, but sometimes, if it isn't some obvious sin in my life causing me to be downcast, depression usually signals something spiritually important is about to happen. Now, there always seems to be sin in my life of one kind or another that I'm realizing or struggling with, but last night I caught a glimpse of something spiritually important! Which is the cause for great excitement and glee!

Yesterday, the Lord gave me an incredible divine appointment, but let me give you some background on the development of this whole thing first. Since I moved into this particular apartment, my heart has been to begin building relationships with my neighbors. Last year, I realized that I had been isolated in my "church" cocoon and had not intentionally built relationships with anyone outside of the "believer capsule". What kind of Christian did the Lord want me to be? - I asked myself. Not the kind that sat, soaked and soured for sure!! So I began a prayer ministry. It wasn't very effective in my opinion, but then, I'm not sure I spent enough time preparing - being prepared myself spiritually that is. But nonetheless, there is a prayer box in our apartment office and I get prayer requests randomly from different residents and pray for them.

I also got more intentional about my actions. I made it a point to talk to neighbors, smile and greet people I met. My neighbors are friendly and sweet, and I have had some great opportunities to have conversations and encourage a couple of the women who live near me. It's been awesome! The whole point was to reach out and let the people of this apartment complex know that I cared and that Jesus cared. I wanted to be the kind of Christian that God lifts up in the bible - Paul, David, Abraham, Peter, etc. I wanted my light to so shine that the world would see my good works and praise my Father in heaven! Oh how I want people to see who Jesus really is! And if I can show them just a little of what I have been given...I just don't understand a person who would reject it! It is TOO sweet and wonderful!

So some intentionality and some prayer have begun to lay the building blocks of these relationships. Which has been awesome! Then yesterday, I made an unusual stop at my apartment complex office to do some paperwork, and a neighbor I have talked to a couple of times was there and needed a ride somewhere. I was glad to take her and we spent the majority of the evening talking about all kinds of things and talking about spiritual matters too. It was great to get to know her a bit!

But the best part of all, is that this timing in her life is one of great spiritual turmoil and the Lord gave me the grace to come in and be a help to her! I cannot express how much joy I feel when the Lord uses me in the lives of other people. The joy was all the more because it was one of the neighbors the Lord has put on my heart! Over this past year or so, God has changed my heart, given me purpose, and is now doing the next thing in His plan!

I ABSOLUTELY LOVE HOW THAT WORKS!!! God said, "For I know the plans I have for you...plans not to harm you, but to prosper you, to give you a hope and a future!!" He also said, "Ask and I will give you the nations". Oh how small my faith that I asked only for my apartment complex! But how faithful He is to begin giving it!

So there is the latest chapter in my life! I am still struggling with the heart condition and the attitude. So please pray, if you would, for the Lord to reveal to me any sin in my life that needs to be dealt with, and pray for a repentant heart on my part, and that the Lord would be glorified in all that I think, say and do!!

Because your love is better than life, my lips will glorify you! Psalm 63:3

Stealing My Joy

I have managed to put down my armor somehow, folks! And in the meantime, the enemy has come and stolen my joy. My attitude has been sour the last couple of days. It's all I can do to keep my tongue from lashing out with sarcasm, bitterness, and hateful words at the people around me...especially those closest to me! I absolutely hate it!

I haven't quite figured out how to get out of this little rut I'm in. I know that our thoughts control our feelings and behaviors, but where to start in that process is a bit overwhelming.

Do you ever feel that way? Like you know what the problem is, but you're not sure that you can and want to go through the hard work of fixing whatever it is? That is kind of how I feel right now. I think I know where the problem is and what I might do to fix it, but I seem apathetic and tired, and therefore, I don't really know that I want to invest in the solution. But then again, there goes that thought process....

I know I must seem like I'm rambling, and for that I'm sorry. I just feel so frustrated with the state I'm in right now.

Anyway, I just wanted to vent a bit. For those of you that read it, there is a part 2 on the prayer blog coming up. I've had a few issues writing it out. I've been studying the numerous passages on prayer and I want to share so much I've been learning with you...but there is something in the way. As soon as I solve the attitude/heart issue I've been having, I have a feeling that the words for the blog will be forthcoming!

So I hope each of you is having a wonderful and blessed week! The Lord has certainly shown me mercy this week!

Write again soon!!

Shannon