30 Day Husband Encouragement Challenge for Wives

I've been married for a whole 8 days! According to our friends at church today, we're still suffering the "wedding glow" and what better time to instill some great habits than right at the beginning stages of this marriage thing!

Recently on Revive Our Hearts Ministry with Nancy Leigh DeMoss (www.reviveourhearts.com), I've been encouraged through Gods word to step up as a woman and be more of what God has called me to be as a helpmate to my husband. (by the way, even saying "my husband" is still a bit weird to me.) lol Being that I know what a sharp tongue I have and how easily and almost unconsciously I can slice through my husband's heart with mere words, the 30 day husband encouragement challenge is daunting!

The bible says we hold the power of life and death in our tongues. I agree. The life of your marriage, ladies, very well could be suffering slow death from the jabs your own tongue have made lately. So I am hoping that you'll take this challenge with me!

What's the challenge? For the next 30 days:

*You can't say anything negative about your husband ...to your husband...or to anyone else, about your husband.
* Say something that you admire or appreciate about your husband...to your husband...and to someone else, about your husband! (Daily)

Tough challenge, huh? For 30 whole days you and I will have to keep our criticism to ourselves and let the praise reign and rain! But why? Why would we do something like this? I mean, come on, guys need to have their big egos deflated, right? They need to know what is on our minds, right? What about "constructive" criticism?

Those thoughts and many others flooded my mind when I thought about this challenge, but let me remind you of the truths I was given:

"The heart of her husband safely trusts her; so he will have no lack of gain. She does him good and not evil all the days of her life." Prov. 31:11-12 It is NOT, I repeat NOT, our place to humble anyone, especially not our husbands, ladies. And contrary to popular belief, our husbands alleged "ego" is next to non-existent, despite its appearance as "over-inflated", so retrain your minds wives - you DO NOT need to deflate anything! You are called to build him up and do him good ALL the days of your lives!

"It is better to live in a corner of a roof than in a house shared with a contentious woman." Proverbs 21:9 Not everything on your mind, especially if you have a particularly negative point of view, needs to be voiced. Personally, if I have a lot of negative things I'm thinking about, I need to be reminded of Philippians 4:8-9 "Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things. The things you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you." Because you see, if I am thinking about whatever is true and honorable and right and excellent, I have little time to be thinking negative things. And when I think less negative things, I SAY less negative things and am therefore less likely to be that contentious, quarrelsome wife that is noted in this proverb. What are YOU thinking on and what kind of things do YOU say throughout the day?

"Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit." Proverbs 18:21 We reap what we sow ladies. If you speak death into your marriage, you will reap death. But if you speak life, you will reap life! It's God's law! Learn it, live it, love it!

"For you were called to freedom, brethren; only do not turn your freedom into an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another" Galatians 5:13 How do you serve your husband? How do you appreciate the ways in which he tries to serve you and your family?

"In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior. Your adornment must not be merely external--braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God." 1 Peter 3:1-4

Ladies, it isn't the outward stuff that makes us good wives. It is the heart of who we are and who we allow God to mold us into that determines the beauty of us as women, wives and mothers. That heart quality is something eternal...doesn't fade with age or time, but in fact, can be heightened with age and time.

To live as God would have us live...to honor His presence in our lives and His Lordship of our hearts, then I ask you how this challenge can do anything but bless you, bless your husband, bless your children if you have them, and bless your Savior Jesus? I challenge you to not shy away because of fear that you "can't do it" because we can do all things through Christ who strengthens us. I challenge you not to shy away because you think your husband might not appreciate it because it is not the praise of men we are after, but the praise of the Lord. Our deeds ought to shine the light of Christ before our husbands and families that they may see His work in us and praise the God whom we serve!

So what do you say ladies? Will you take the challenge and begin to lay down a foundation of encouragement in your marriage? It doesn't matter if you've been married 8 days, 8 years or are approaching your golden anniversary! It is NEVER too late to be transformed by the renewing of your mind!

God bless you and your husbands and may your hearts be transformed!